Melmonica

11.45pm

I lay down on my bed, hugging zhumao & bucuk tightly. Thinking about the things that I was supposed to do over the weekend but I didn’t. Disappointed with myself.

The week passed to fast to breathe in.

I called him and he was busy. We talked a while but I didn’t mention what was really on my mind.

So we hung up and I hugged them lagi tight. Last week at this time… what I was doing?

Hanging out/supper with the part-timers after work at  Gurney Drive. Had this MUST EAT rojak which Soo Ai recommended. i had it ever since i first tasted it

12.05am

Tears started rolling.

I’ve been so patient for the whole day not disturbing his guys day out. And now it’s after midnight still not enough to lepak?

Not that I wana stop him from going out but… at this time when I need him the most. I just wish that he would make me feel wanted.

Not just call to update me about his whereabouts. Not just saying ‘I love you. Muacks’ at the end of every phone call just cos it’s a thing we always say.

I just want to hear you say you love me and really mean it.

By that time I started to send him some really nasty text cos I was angry that he wasn’t with me when I needed him the most.

No point changing to digi.

Fuck off.

I will be gone. Ja.

And then I switched off my handphone.

I really tak tahan why I need to suffer, miss him like hell. What am I doing with my life?? I’m freakin’ 24 this year. I am supposed to have the time of my life. Chasing my dreams.  Do the wildest craziest thing. But over the weekend, I just stayed at home and locked myself in the room.

I didn’t feel like meeting anyone. I didn’t feel like talking to anybody.

I onlined/blogged/FB/read/eat = chocolate/biscuits yepp, that’s practically what i ate on saturday

That’s why in my previous blog I wrote that my condition right now is WAYYY worst that UMS. At least back in UMS, I was eating proper food.

12.15am

He called. We argued/cry/he brainwashed me/i cried even more

for that 45 minutes, he was practically brainwashing persuading me. To move to Penang and live together.

I hesitated. Cos I am not ready to move in with him. I worried if it might damage than do good to our relationship.

Okay okay… I really do want to be with him. But I just can’t… i just can’t…

If I were to move to Penang,  I basically am giving up my career. My future. I’ve never done anything like that. Especially for a boy.

What makes you think that you won’t get a good job in Penang? You have Intact Group. Nuffnang.

Yeah, but how fucking sure are you that I’ll get a job in either of this company?

Then he said, let’s work in Singapore by end this year.

That time lagi I pening kepala. I’m not sure if I can get a job in Penang now you’re asking me to find a job in Singapore??

The conversation ended with a lot of sighing. A lot of ‘I need time to think it through‘ and a lot of ‘I need to sleep. Working tomorrow.’

6.15am

Woke up WAYYY earlier than the time I set. Bersemangat cos I made up my mind. I realised this year I didn’t make any new year resolution and now am making one.

Finally, I’m ready to take charge of my life.

7.05pm

I told you. Every time after work, I feel like I should stay in KL. My job opens up so many learning opportunity which I’m yearning of. Can’t just throw it all out of the window just for a boy.

I just woke up. Hearing the cheers from Stadium Merdeka reminds me of how the boys cheered during  football match in ACS.

This weekend was mostly spent melayan my emo. Everytime I wake up, I’d think… Last week at this time… I miss him. I really do miss him. And every time I’m like this, I have the thoughts of going back to Sitiawan or transferring to Penang.

Just say, if I go back to Sitiawan. I work there, spend less and be happier. Cos I’m always homesick and I miss Matthew so much. He’s growing so fast that I wish I had the chance of watching him grow. Then again, I could foresee. If I were in Sitiawan, I would say that the life there is boring, my job wouldn’t be as challenging as my job in KL, wana be adventurous la bla bla *sigh

But if I get a job in Penang, first thought would be yay, got boyfriend to teman me all the time. Won’t be lonely at all and, and… I couldn’t think of anything jor zzz. But then right, in the first place, one of the many reasons I didn’t find a job in Penang is because I wana test our relationship. See if it is strong enough to withstand the distance. And another reason is I want baby to have his own life. Like he can do whatever he wants, go out with his friends etc. Well, that applies on me as well la.

Sigh, sometimes I also don’t know what I want. Wana be independent also me, wana bermanja also me-_-

Anyway, all this has nothing to do with my relationship with my job. It’s fun at times, challenging at times and paling best is it’s very de social media oriented *woots

Aarghhh, it’s raining now and I’m so de emo-ing again.

Psst. Sometimes I can’t wait to go back to work cos I don’t want to ber-emo anymore. So depressing la talking to myself. Listening to my conscious fighting amongst themselves. And eat sucky food cos I wana save money. Sigh, my condition now is WAYYYY worst than my life in UMS. Although that time I was away from home, still I got him to bitch about my day and friends to gila with and freaking go to the beach whenever we want!. But now, everybody is all so busy.

One of my favourite place in campus. The library. Got aircond and that’s me wearing my pajamas. Don’t know what I was doing. Probably reading somebody’s blog. So intense one my reaction.

Tata.

Hola!

I just came back from Penang last week and it was my second trip in two months. So I’ll squeeze in 2 Penang trips post into 1:)

In Jan, went down to celebrate baby’s birthday and early Valentine’s Day. Well, actually, everytime we meet, it feels like Valentine’s Day. Cos we meet like once a month and that one time means a lot. Precious, precious moment.

Baby brought me to this Taiwanese restaurant for lunch one day.

We ordered Mini Steamboat.

Tomyam Mini steamboat

Psst. The red blurry thing on the bottom left is pork slice. Yums!

Baby’s favourite. Forgot what it is called -_-”

The best thing about visiting baby in Penang is.

Can take picture while on motorbike how i wish it was a vespa

Transformer.

Starting to take pictures that scream AH HANNNNNNNN!

It wasn’t easy taking picture on a motorbike. One needs to be very alert and can quickly think of what story to tell by taking a particular picture.

This was taken before the man turned into a junction.

Komtar.

In another trip.

Baby attempts to be artsy fartsy.

Sipping on green tea ice blended while reading an old issue of National Geographic *geek mode on

G Hotel

A quick lunch at Pastamania before Valentine’s Day. Couldn’t decide which is the best photo of the pasta so you be the judge.

#1

#2

#3

From the earlier food pics, I think you can more or less know which one is taken by me.

After movie, go take pics again.

Okay this is cheat one. We were still when I took this. That’s why so symmetry.

Sigh if only I got wide angle lens.

Even go vertical also cannot save Mayfair building.

Baby pai de.

Hello uncle.

Gotcha mister.

Hello mister. Again.

He managed to cycle in front of us cos he didn’t stop at the traffic light hence overtook us.

And then we lunch at Kochabi. The same Taiwanese restaurant we came during my last trip.

If only you had showed me your body.

His colleagues recommended this beef noodle. It’s a MUST TRY when you are here.

Well, looks can be deceiving. After I tried it, sad to say but it tasted like the RM5 instant beef noodle Elias bought last time at 7 Eleven in Taiwan zzz.

When we were here, the second time, all the food price increase by RM1. Probably because of CNY week. Ice water also increase 20 cents making it RM1.20. Freaking ice water per glass.

Alien invasion.

Very skinny fireworks on the 2nd day of My FM event at Esplanade.

Lastly, RM7 rojak at Gurney Drive for supper.

He: Okok. I got questions wana ask you. And I need your honest answer. Just wana know more about my gf. If on Friday I cannot send you to Starbucks, and you gotta stay at home, what would you do?

She: Haa… err… watch movie lu…

He: Then..?

She: Read books? Your National Geographic magazine…

He: What else?

She: Listening to music kua… By that time you’ll reach home already lor.

He: From your answer I can see that you’re a very manja gf. Why didn’t you say that you’ll help me to clean my room, do my laundry etc?

She: Eekkk… This is how you get me to do your chores?

He: Then will you do it for me?

She: Maybe I’ll help you to tidy up your place but not clean it. Perhaps I’ll just dump all your stuffs into your big ass luggage.

He: -_-”

I <3 my bf so much.

Ok I hope to take more street photo than my last trip to Penang. It was so unsuccessful. Don’t know why.

Useful hands,

Eyes of an eagle,

Young at heart,

Lives forever <3

She said I’m wuliau -_-”

Belly dancer,

4-eyed babe,

Always the smart one,

Please laugh at my jokes!!

And then she laughs like a vampire

Double -_-”

Kidnapped Saved a humongous turtle on the roadside and placed it under my seat wtf.

Go to some random newly-wed couple’s CNY open house and get angpau for it.

*searched HD for funny pics.

Became one of the model laughing stock for baby’s assignment.

those dorky clothes are his

*Sorry for stealing your unpublished photo

Played baseball with my sundress while a cow was doing yoga?

*Aah, my favourite pic:)

And also went to KK alone to meet my family.

My dad’s home has one of the most gorgeous view I have ever seen.

Guess where?

Went to Shout Awards with KC and the boys & got nominated as wtf  Best Intern inside joke

Celebrated our 3 years freakin’ relationship

Silly/Incredible. With Elias and slow shuttle speed.

Hung out with the ever sweet, always funny Stephanie in Sitiawan.

This woman so busy and super comel at the same time <3

When it was her time to bring me kai kai at KL. No need to say where we went…

Can’t resist to post the food that we ate XP

X’mas week itself.

Went to Penang and baby wrapped my present in this cutesy paper!

Salivating for durian ice cream & bigger apple donut? hahaha.

And then got Ampang Yong Taufu, Pizza Heart (BUY 1 FREE1 sumore), Rotiball and Melaka Cendol sumore wahh so cute arh!

*okok i just received a damn good news now & i’m distracted from blogging

Oh ya on X’mas Day we went kai kai as usual.

At G Hotel.

Tested a 50mm lens.

Dinner at somewhere nice.

Please don’t tell 先生 we did this.

Penang night light. Nicer than KL’s lor.

Annie Leibovitz wannabe.

Final showdown to end 2009 from my apartment wtf lansi.

Happy CNY y’all wtf.

After 3 years of not celebrating CNY in S’wan, I finally iz here.

So anybody wana kidnap me, just do it.

You know where to reach me:))

just moved new server, this is a test post for photo

upload. Picture grab from windows 7 image directory.

Yay, I just miraculously put my Twitter into my blog. I’ve wanted to do this for a very long time. Simply try and tell myself, let’s just put this widget under calendar widget and see what happens. Update and walah, it’s there yipee!

As you can see I got no followers so damn pathetic better go commit suicide zzz but whatever lah, it doesn’t mean anything also sad life but if you’re reading this and you got twitter please do follow me @melmonica beg beg please please.

As you know, baby and I turned 3 years jor. Another miracle since I have commitment issues but thank god for baby. He showed me that life is not all about drama and fame so shallow kan my life before him. He is the one person that I can be truly goofy and be the craziest woman that you’d swear that I just came out from Tanjung Rambutan. He had already record a video of me doing a horrendous dance to Fatboy Slim’s Right Here, Right Now and if he uploads it on Youtube and accidentally is a hit then you know that sot (crazy) girl is me.

Anyway, this anniversary is the 1st anniversary that we actually celebrate on the day itself. Cos before this, it either falls on a weekday or either one of us is busy etc so we had to postpone the celebration. Anyway, go to my Facebook photos to view the album.

Most of the picture taken are very the artistic style and my personal favourite are these.

Yala 2nd pic photoshop kao kao. Aku sebenarny tak secantik dalam gambar T.T

But dunno why 2 many people like this picture

But I think if the white chairs weren’t there, the pic will look nicer.

Ok. Post end here. wtf i’m such a lousy blogger with her own dot com

PS: Will share my tips on how to beautify yourself using Photoshop in the next post. I know, fake but who cares? We girls and some guys love it:P

PPS: Am listening to iTunes’ many variety of online radio. Damn nice. Lotsa choices for you to pick and listen.

PPPS: My fav stations are GotRadio-Top 40 and HitzRadio.com. Not our hitz.fm k.

PPPPS: Wow, heard a radio ad said that in America, if Walmart found out that other shops sell same goods lower price than its store, then it will lower its price to match the competitor’s price. That’s why la Malaysia forbid Walmart from opening here. Bankrupt la all kedai runcit.

PPPPPS: Btw, I think it’s a good marketing strategy.

PPPPPPS: Ok. Night sleepyhead.

Dear people,

すみません on my absence. Been really busy with my farming on Facebook (lame.. i know). After internship, I basically catch up with friends, jalan-jalan cari makan and go down south to Johor. Yepp, in Muar now lepaking till 20th September then go back to S’wan for Raya.

Before coming down to Muar, I dropped by KL and bought myself a lil DSLR toy (more like my dad sponsored laa) and utilized it immediately the next day. So, let the pictures do the talking:)

First pic took with the cam<3

For no photoshop pictures:-

Oohhhh, I’m lovin’ my toy.

Pictures taken by my personal photographer, my baby<3